A co-worker of mine has a weblog about relationships. I was intrigued by his post “on Passion and saying I Love You “.
He starts the article with a conversation that he overheard:
“Woman 1: So has he said it yet?
Woman 2: No. I wish that he would.
Woman 1: Why don’t you say it?
Woman 2: Because it’s too soon.
Woman 1: You’re probably right.
Woman 2: I don’t mind waiting…”
It reminds me of a couple I knew who broke up recently. They’d been together for over 2 years but had never exchanged the Three Words. The guy never said it because he never felt it, and the woman never said it because the guy had never said it. She did love him and if she’d said it, he would not have been able to ignore the position they were in. The position where one feels more strongly than the other. The moment of “where do we go from here?”
When it did all finally come out, she was quite hurt that he’d stayed with her even though he knew he would never fall in love with her.
It is perfectly natural to be afraid of being vulnerable, however once the realization of Love has happened,whether expressed or not, the level of investment is set. Your fate is sealed.
However, you cannot expect someone to read your mind.
You are responsible for your own happiness!
So in Madonna’s fine words:
You deserve the best in life / So if the time isn’t right then move on /
Second best is never enough / You’d do much better, Baby on your own
Don’t go for second best, baby / Put your love to the test.