Once I woke up at sunrise (yes! me!) and sat in a quiet and peaceful meditation as the sun came up. Rarely is it that easy. might have been that I was still mostly asleep.
Sometimes I sit still. Telling myself to meditate but my mind can only calm down for a brief second and the stillness is so shallow that it is barely perceptible. And then my narrative picks up right where it left off. or it says “you’re not meditating at all! You’re only pretenditating.”
When this happens the time and patience required to get to the point of actually meditating is unbearable and I just go find an immediately gratifying distraction.
And the smiling Buddha laughs at me for being human.